Vegan MoFo Day 11: Reliable Old Subway

Another busy day and another lunch date with my Little!  He needed Subway and he needed it baddddd.  I don't know how he got it in his head, because I always bring lunch to him or take him home to eat.  We only go to fast food if we are out of town or desperate.

But this week has been CRAZY BUSY so I went with it.

He was kind of happy that I agreed.

Here's his kid's meal.  Good old reliable Veggie Delite, apple slices, and a Juice Box.

Then came funny face time.

Can't stop at just one...

CHOMP.

CHOMP CHOMP.

And the prize of the day, the reusable bag his lunch came in.  Turns out this is what his insistence was all about.  One of his friends at preschool is to blame!

Picky Eaters: It gets better.

Trying to get myself back into the jam of blogging, I have been rereading my old posts and just noticing the huge theme of Silas' picky eating.  I feel like "picky eating" has a huge stigma to it and no one ever bothers to find out why people, especially children, eat that way.  The why is the first step to fixing it, though, right? 

Maybe your child is typical in that his taste buds just aren't ready for stronger tastes?  Shae was that way and we combated it with our rule that you have to take "Just one bite!" each time a food was served.  One cooperative bite here and there usually led to him growing to like new things!  It takes awhile to get used to new tastes and textures.

With Silas, we found out early on it was related to his sensory issues.  He has been in Speech Therapy and seeing an OT since he was almost 2 and it has taught me so much.  He didn't have a means of communication for a really long time and you can imagine how frustrating that was!  For us, definitely, but for him really.  I can't imagine not being able to express the slightest needs/wants to anyone and of course that stemmed to tantrums.  Lots and lots of tantrums.  So many things toddlers do are dismissed as being "terrible 2's!", but with Silas we needed to look at why he was upset in each situation to see how we could make life easier for him.  Well, not actually easier, per say, but we needed to teach him to manage his life in a way that worked for him so that he didn't have to struggle through normal day to day activities that are easy for everyone else.  It feels odd talking about him like this now because 3 years later, you wouldn't know by being around him that he needed any kind of help.   He gets complimented constantly for being so polite and well-behaved.  He's also the silliest, most imaginative kid I know.

Back to food.  Here's the backstory:  I breastfed Silas until he was nearly 3.  He had an aversion to all things plastic from the get go.  Refused to drink pumped milk or water from any type of bottle of sippy cup.  And believe me, I tried them all.  He just was an all natural kind of baby and wanted to nurse anytime and all of the time, which was fantastic!  I was eating extremely healthy and was sure I was getting all the nutrients we both needed.   When he started eating purees and then solids, much later, it became evident that he had really clear tastes that he was using every bit of will power he had to uphold.  I get it, kiddo, I feel you.  I tried all of the tricks.  We tried all of the foods in all of the ways.  Sometimes, it felt hopeless.  Sometimes, I thought he would never eat more than carbs.  For awhile we stuck with green protein smoothies and homemade green Popsicles because it was the only way.  I spent a lot of time worrying he wasn't getting what he needed and even more time feeling like I was failing him because I didn't know how to fix this.

After awhile, I started to look at his food likes and dislikes from the point of view that we looked at his life.  Which, now that I know better, I wonder why we don't immediately do for all kids?  He used to freak out when we put him in the bathtub because the water running was so loud and the lights were so bright and it was overstimulating.  Okay, so what was overstimulating him about dinner?  It became clear that he preferred crunchy foods without sauces.  Okay, we can do that.  I steam our veggies less and separate his portions before combining them with other dishes.   Slowly but surely we applied this to everything we eat.  Once he liked something for awhile, we would push it a bit further. Sometime he was okay with that too, and we were one step further along.  Sometimes, he had to dial it back and wait a little longer.   It's always a process, but it's amazing to see how far he's come.  He eats the same foods we do, every day now.  We do still make allowances for his needs, like no sauces, but nothing that is very difficult or compromises the nutritional value.  There was a long time there that I could not imagine at all if he would ever willingly eat a single vegetable and now he begs for them!  I wish I had actually believed, back then, that he would come this far.  But it's true, it does get better. 

The old post that got me thinking about this was from 2010.  I posted about Silas' love for apples, which was seriously one of maybe 3 things he actually liked at the point, and I said "Now if only we can get him to have this same kind of obsession with something green!".   Well, yesterday he came home from preschool with an About Me book he created.  Check this out:

SUCCESS.




***If you suspect your child might have sensory issues I strongly recommend getting an evaluation from an Occupation Therapist, the eval is just playing and them watching for clues.  Your child will probably have a ball and you can either stop worrying or start making your life and your kid's much, much easier.  It's probably nothing, but go with your gut!  You know your child better than anyone else does.  Our OT recommended this book to me and it was really helpful.  Most of it didn't apply to Silas, but the things that did, clicked so hard that it was amazing. 

Hello out there! It's me, Kelly. Yes, we abandoned you. It was bound to happen. But we're still here and we're still vegan. The vegan kid is 11 and has a 19 month old little brother (whom I am nursing as I type). Today I'm going to repost an article I wrote for an online vegetarian magazine (that is now defunct) when Shae was 4.

I have a friend whose family just went vegan- against all odds!- and she reminded me of those days today. Way back when we decided not to be apart of the masses and to make better choices for the animals and also for our bodies, even if they were the choices that involved more effort. Sometimes it's hard to remember ever not being vegan...



Veganism for the Four Year Old

Veganism isn't about drama for Shae; it's just his life. Shae doesn't eat animal products because he loves animals. One quirky thing about our family is that when he asks me questions about food, farms, life, anything really... I tell him the truth….not the graphic truth, but the edited for-his-little-ears truth. I see it as my job as a mother to educate him, to prepare him for the world. Lying or dumbing things down for him is just holding him back. Why would I withhold knowledge from my child? Isn't knowledge the key to his future?

Shae: Why don't we eat meat?
Me: Because we don't want to hurt animals. Meat is the body of an animal...and to get the meat, the animal has to get dead. Besides, meat makes our bodies not healthy.

Shae: Why isn't everyone vegetarian, Mommy?
Me: Not everyone takes the time to learn things, so they don't understand how bad eating animals is yet.

Shae: Why don't we drink regular milk?
Me: That kind of milk comes from cows. It comes from the mommy cow's body to feed her babies. It isn't made for human bodies. The farmers that take the milk from the mommies are very mean to them and hurt them. If we drink soy milk it is healthier for our bodies and doesn't hurt any one at all!

Shae: Why don't we eat honey?
Me:The bees spend their lives making the honey for themselves, it would be mean if we took it from them and if we take their honey from their hives, it could hurt them or make them die.

Shae sometimes gets frustrated when he sees family members eating meat. It's hard for him to understand why so many people just don't care about the animals, but then again, that's hard for me to understand too. He's been known to ask people, especially his many grandparents, "Why are you eating that animal?" and follows up with "Don't you want that little cow to live with its mommy and daddy instead of getting dead and going into your tummy?" This has led to many a meal abruptly turning at least vegetarian to please him. He has influenced so many people with his wide-eyed innocence than most hardcore activists could ever imagine doing. How can you look into such a sweet, loving little face, and say that you don't care if your meal had a mommy or daddy, because you like how it tastes?

It isn't just family & friends that Shae has influenced; he's also been turning the heads of pure strangers. With his homemade vegetarian t-shirts and sweet words he has been able to explain his cruelty-free lifestyle to willing, open-minded people. They aren't angry or defensive as they might get with adults, so he's able to get his point across more clearly.

The thing about Shae that makes him special is that he isn't trying to preach like a lot of us activists find ourselves doing. He just does what comes naturally to him! Maybe that is why when people learn of his veganism, he's never been met with any opposition or challenges. He's just a regular kid that plays on a tee ball team, runs around the yard with his dogs, loves to paint… and happens to not eat any animal products.

Cutting all animal products out of his diet had many benefits for Shae. As an omnivore, he got sick easily and frequently. He caught all the viruses that went around, and would get sick to his stomach easily after eating certain meals. As he went vegetarian, he started getting sick a lot less frequently. Then we began slowly cutting the last cheese products out of his diet, and started to notice that if he got sick it would be after something cheesy. Now as a vegan, he hasn't been sick at all. He never even gets an upset stomach. He has slimmed down and has tons more energy. Even his pediatrician has commented on the positive changes, saying "whatever you're feeding him, you're doing something right!"

So, when you hear the word, "vegan", think beyond the crunchy granola hippies and hardcore scenesters images, and picture an average, bright-eyed 4-year-old little boy! Shae doesn't meet any of the stereotypes, but he sure wants to break some boundaries.

---Kelly Dyer is the happily married, vegan, full-time mother of Shae.